Police in Resort Vacation Areas: The Threats and Violent

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John Jay Wiley (1:29): He is a retired police officer. He spent much of his career working in coastal resort towns where manpower was in short supply. He's here to talk about some incidents from the job, how it impacted him, and much more. Welcome to the law enforcement talk radio show. In the law enforcement talk radio show, we are joined by special guest talking about their experiences, their of investigating crimes.

John Jay Wiley (1:58): Plus, those who've experienced horrendous trauma, police, first responders, military, and victims of crime share their stories. Hi. I'm John Jay Wiley. In addition to being a broadcaster, I'm also a retired police sergeant. Be sure to check out our website, letradio.com and also like us on Facebook.

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John Jay Wiley (3:04): Contact us from the great state of North Carolina. We have doctor Dondi Day on the law enforcement talk radio show. He is a retired police officer from the Apex North Carolina Police Department who worked in lots of coastal resort communities. We think it'd be a piece of cake and usually is not. And I I'm kind of surprised some of the stories he's tell.

John Jay Wiley (3:24): He's gonna talk about some of the impact on him from police work, the realities of doing the job. He's also author of the book, Go Smoke and the Badge, A Memoir of Brotherhood, Fear and a Weight of Duty. His website his website is doctordoctorr-dandy.com. That's doctor-dandy.com. Doctor Dandy, thanks for being guest on the law enforcement talk radio show.

Unknown Speaker (3:47): Thanks for your service. Both very much appreciate it.

Unknown Speaker (3:50): Yeah. Thank you. Thank you for having me.

Unknown Speaker (3:52): By the way, I gotta tell you a story. I I I teased this earlier. The I knew one other guy with the name of Dondi. He spelled his first name a little different. He used two e's instead of I.

John Jay Wiley (4:03): I was in a gunfight with him. He did a murder. He murdered someone, took their Corvette, robbed them, got in a gunfight with me, and it was a a all an all out brawl. Thank goodness he survived. I survived as well.

John Jay Wiley (4:17): But, you're the second Dundee I've met my entire life.

Dondi Day (4:22): Right. Right. It's it's very uncommon up around the the Cincinnati, Ohio area. It's more common. I've met about seven people with the same name.

Unknown Speaker (4:35): So, yeah,

Unknown Speaker (4:35): it's It's a name you don't hear very often. Is it is it an old school name? Is it ethnic name, or is it combination of both?

Dondi Day (4:42): Well, you know, the story that I've that I've been told by my grandmother is it's an Irish name, but it was carried over.

Unknown Speaker (4:52): Uh-huh.

Dondi Day (4:52): And in Cincinnati, in the Cincinnati News Times, there was a cartoon character named Dondi. It was a redheaded boy with blue eyes who was always into trouble, kinda like Dennis the Minutes to a certain extent. And for some reason, my mother just decided to name me that. So that's how that came about.

John Jay Wiley (5:13): See, I'm of Irish Catholic descent. My my grandparents immigrated from Ireland, and I've never heard that name before. I've heard it twice now.

Unknown Speaker (5:20): Right. Right. Right.

John Jay Wiley (5:22): So imagine if I go back to visit there, I'll I'll run-in some Dundies.

Dondi Day (5:26): Well, I think so. And and you can actually Google it and see the the old cartoon strips online. It it's it's really interesting.

John Jay Wiley (5:35): Next question before we get into your story. Were you brutalized as a child with that name?

Dondi Day (5:41): Oh my gosh. No. Not really. If anything, it's it anytime somebody heard the name, they knew if they knew me, they were like, oh, absolutely. I knew you.

Dondi Day (5:54): So you know? But, you know, I I couldn't hide from things, especially from my mother.

John Jay Wiley (6:00): No. No. Not with by the way, way back in the day, when our mothers would stick their head out the the door or the window and say, get inside, it's time for dinner, and they call you by your full name, your first and last and middle name, you knew it was time to go indoors.

Dondi Day (6:17): Mhmm. Absolutely. Absolutely.

John Jay Wiley (6:19): And if you gave her any back talk, my mother's Irish Catholic. She would give you the the the back of her hand in a heartbeat.

Dondi Day (6:25): Absolutely. You know, it it was kinda interesting. You know, in our neighborhood, I I I called them for a lack of a better word, the town criers. Right? They they knew the kids in the neighborhood.

Dondi Day (6:41): And, you know, all they had to do was say Dandy did this or Dandy did that, and everybody knew that was me. So I I could never really hide from anything Gotcha. Whatsoever.

John Jay Wiley (6:52): Well, back in the day and we're gonna walk down memory lane just a little bit, then we'll get into your story. Back in the day, it wasn't just your parents disciplined you. It was the teachers. It was the principals, and it was the neighbors.

Dondi Day (7:07): Correct. Yes. It was.

John Jay Wiley (7:09): And by the way, I learned respect from neighborhood boys.

Dondi Day (7:14): Mhmm. Mhmm. Mhmm. Yeah. Absolutely.

Dondi Day (7:18): You know, in the the book that we're talking about today is really, it's my sixth book. The very first one that I wrote is about, you know, what it's like to grow up here on the coast. It was really interesting,

Unknown Speaker (7:37): but then I'll go you a question. Did you grow up in Ohio, or did you grow up in Carolina?

Dondi Day (7:42): North Carolina. My father was military.

John Jay Wiley (7:45): Gotcha.

Dondi Day (7:45): He was a marine. Yep. Got stationed here, met my mother, loved it, settled down here, but we we bounced back and forth between North Carolina and Ohio Gotcha. Over the years.

John Jay Wiley (7:58): Yep. So the the I was gonna ask you how you wind up policing in in North Carolina, but it's not a long stretch because you lived there.

Dondi Day (8:06): Yes. Yeah. You know, we we love it here. If you really like a slow coastal lifestyle, it's definitely here. I lived up in Chicago for about nine years after I retired from Apex.

Dondi Day (8:24): And, you know, I love Chicago. I love the area, the subdivision. The area that we lived in was very, very nice. However, the winters are brutal.

Unknown Speaker (8:36): It's tough.

Dondi Day (8:38): Yeah. And the cost of living is so much more than it is here.

John Jay Wiley (8:43): So I have friends in the Chicago area. I've been to some conferences in Chicago in February and in Downtown Chicago, the Miracle Mile. And I don't care what they tell you, it's cold. It is really cold. You

Dondi Day (8:56): know, when you're wearing a suit or even, you know, the the pants they give you in law enforcement, the first time you experience a 40 below wind chill wind hits you, you'll you'll know it. It it's brutal. It really is. It's so cold.

John Jay Wiley (9:13): I went to your website, and I saw pictures of you. And I think you're a little younger than me, but when I started policing in the Baltimore Police Department in 1980, they gave us wool pants, which let everything in. They were they were cold. They were really cold. And woolen reefers for wintertime.

John Jay Wiley (9:31): And they they would add 25 we'd have 25 pounds extra weight on you when you had the reefer on, between the gun belt and everything else. When they got wet in the wintertime, it was about 40 pounds.

Dondi Day (9:43): Mhmm. Mhmm. Yep. Absolutely.

John Jay Wiley (9:46): And you smell like a wet dog. I don't care what you do. You're just not gonna get that smell out of you.

Dondi Day (9:51): You know, it's were issued those types of pants and the shirts at one time, but they eventually switched over to like a polyester, which was even worse. I mean, it would dry quicker, but you would constantly stay cold. And here on the coast, you know, even though the temperatures are moderate, it still gets cold.

John Jay Wiley (10:15): It does. And that wind and all that humidity, we're talking with doctor Dondi Day, retired police officer from Apex, North Carolina, author of multiple books. And most recent is Ghost, Smoke, and The Badge, a memoir of brotherhood, fear, and a weight of duty. His website is doctordr-dandy.com. That's doctor-dandy.com.

John Jay Wiley (10:36): And if you're on the Clubhouse drop in audio chat app, be sure to look for me and follow me. My name's John, the letter j, Wiley, w I l e y. You can also search for at LET radio show. That's John J. Wiley, w I l e y, at LET radio show on the clubhouse drop in audio chat app.

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John Jay Wiley (12:20): Returning conversation with doctor Don D Day on the law enforcement talk radio show. He is a retired police officer from Apex, North Carolina. He worked in many resort communities as a police officer in Coastal North Carolina, which we'll talk about in few moments. Well, that stuff still happened there. He's the author of multiple books.

John Jay Wiley (12:38): His most recent is Ghost, Smoke, and the Badge, a memoir of brotherhood, fear, and the weight of duty. Sounds kinda heavy duty, and his website is doctordr-dandy.com. That's doctor-dandy.com. Before we get into your your books, number one, what possessed you to go into policing? Was this a a calling?

John Jay Wiley (13:02): If you came from a military family, it wasn't something you grew up in. Right?

Dondi Day (13:07): Well, yeah, actually, it was it was kind of inherited. My grandfather was a police officer in Cincinnati. My father was a police officer for a short time after he got out of the Marine Corps. And then I went in, and then my younger brother went in as well. So we come from a line of police officers.

John Jay Wiley (13:31): So and here's the when I started in Baldwin Police Department, we had a lot of the more experienced officers that were Vietnam combat veterans, and they they didn't play. We had a few command staff that were Korean War veterans at the time. This is 1980. So they were around and they made their their presence known, but the main the main thing they talked about was respect. They always show respect until they change the tone of the conversation.

John Jay Wiley (13:54): Then there's absolutely no backing down because there's an audience watching what you do. But here's the before we go into your story, I being in the Baltimore Police Department, I got exposed to a lot of violence, lots of crime, lots of trauma, all that stuff. And I thought mistakenly that the county guys, the guys that worked, and I say guys, that means men and women, that worked in the resort communities, the coastal communities had it easy. I had no idea. Was is that true?

Dondi Day (14:21): Yeah. Definitely, it's it's a different type of law enforcement. You know, you're dealing with a different clientele. Let me put it that way. But the crime is still there, and you have bad actors coming in from a lot of different areas that, you know, they they come down and look for opportunities.

Dondi Day (14:41): They they're breaking in the houses. They're breaking in the cars. There there's considerable amount of rape and assaults. I mean, you think about it. The people come down.

Dondi Day (14:52): They're having a good time. They may drink a little bit too much, have a little bit too much fun, and then you're called to deal with it. Right. And that kind of leads into some of the the issues with law enforcement when you're working in a coastal community. Your backup may be anywhere from fifteen to thirty minutes away.

Dondi Day (15:13): So, a lot of times, you are out there by yourself and things can go wrong really quickly if you don't know how to to, you know, handle things. For instance, you know, one of the the things that I had to deal with and I think about a lot of these calls is, you know, a party goes, you know, sideways. People are starting to fight and argue. They go out onto the balcony of this four story condominium complex. When I arrive, you know, I have to immediately go hands on with somebody, and he's about to pick me up and throw me over the rail

Unknown Speaker (15:54): Right.

Dondi Day (15:55): Four stories down. Right? And then you need to make a decision how you're going to handle it, what type of force you're gonna use to get out of that situation. You know, the first thing is try to use your voice and calm them down, and the last resort is, you know, taking some type of lethal action against them. But It

John Jay Wiley (16:15): is. It really is a last resort. Happen. Well and and one of the things that I kind of object to is a recent term that a lot of people use deescalation and deescalation techniques. Like, we weren't doing that in the eighties.

John Jay Wiley (16:26): We didn't shoot everybody we dealt with. Right. We didn't go hands on with everybody we dealt with. As a matter of fact, that wasn't very often, but when it was, it was ugly. And by the way, I've had a guest on the show say in the past that deescalation is a technique that's gotta be done by both parties, not just one.

Dondi Day (16:46): It is. It is. You know, one of the things I I learned a long time ago, and it was from a mentor, is a lot of times the deescalation is to not take any action. A lot of times people are just upset. They wanna vent or whatever the case may be, and you just sit there, protect yourself, but let them just get it out, and then you can see it kind of leave them.

Dondi Day (17:12): Right? They they kinda calm down. And then, you know, you're not going to talk sense into somebody that is agitated. You know, you you've got to think about how you're going to approach them to get them to calm down. And my point with that is just let them vent.

Dondi Day (17:32): Let them get it out. And and a lot of times, they'll just come right down.

John Jay Wiley (17:37): One of the things that we had, and I'm gonna use this as an example, domestic disputes, family disturbances, which I hated. I I can't stand them to this day. As a matter of fact, I cannot stand any conversations about he said, she said, who struck John, other than them. I'm not interested. I'm not the guy anymore.

John Jay Wiley (17:54): But, one of the things that we would do is we we scan the people involved and say, well, we're talking to them and we try to calm them down. Number one, wanna calm them down. Number two, you wanna find out whether there is a threat. There's a criminal there. Are they all victims?

John Jay Wiley (18:08): Are they a threat to you? Are they a threat to other people? Do I have to take action right away? These were things that I would imagine that you had to deal with as well.

Dondi Day (18:18): Oh, absolutely. A lot of times, you know the number one rule when you're dealing with domestics is you never go in alone. Never alone. Period. Yeah.

Dondi Day (18:28): Because that is one of the most dangerous situations that you get into. But if we had a domestic in some of these coastal communities, we would have to call either the the highway patrol or the sheriff's department to come back us up. A lot of times, they were the closest. And we would have to wait for them the time they arrived. A lot of times, the domestic is over.

Dondi Day (18:54): One party is left. Right. You know, it's kinda resolved itself, and then it turns into some type of investigation that you need to to to do. But if you get there and you see that it is hot that, you know, the the people are still arguing, well, you know, you have to think about how you're going to approach that, but you never go in just full guns blazing. Right?

Dondi Day (19:21): There are certain things you have to do. I I had a mentor tell me one time, and, you know, when you're a rookie, you you just don't you you don't know everything. You have to pick it up as you go. And I remember standing in front of the door of this one house, and it was blacked out. And I'm sitting there looking through the screen door, and then I see the silhouette of a man with a shotgun.

Dondi Day (19:51): And my my mentor told me, he looks like you never stand in front of a door.

John Jay Wiley (19:57): Never stand in front of doors or windows ever.

Dondi Day (19:59): Yeah. Ever. And so that was a tough lesson for me to learn. It was a very good lesson, but, you know, things could have went really bad quickly. Thank god they they didn't.

Dondi Day (20:13): But, yeah, that that taught me something. And the thing about it is when you're even wearing a vest, you know, somebody shooting you with a slug, it is gonna be a very bad

John Jay Wiley (20:25): day. It's gonna be a really bad day. We're talking with doctor Don D Day, retired police officer from Apex, North Carolina. He worked in multiple coastal resort communities, and we're gonna talk about some of that in a few moments. He's the author of multiple books.

John Jay Wiley (20:38): Most recent book is Ghost, Smoke, and the Badge, a Memoir of Brotherhood, Fear, and a Weight of Duty, and his website is doctordondi.com. That's dr-dondi.com. Drdondi.com. This is law enforcement talk radio show. Don't go anywhere.

John Jay Wiley (20:54): We will be right back. You know, we used to have an app, and it was a very popular app. And then guess what? We couldn't hold a candle to our Facebook presence. How many people have the mobile Facebook app already installed on their phone?

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John Jay Wiley (22:02): Because we're in a conversation with doctor Don D Day on the law enforcement talk radio show. He is retired police officer from Apex, North Carolina. He worked in multiple coastal resort communities. He's the author of multiple books. Most recent is Ghost Smoke and the Badge, a Memoir of Brotherhood, Fear, and a Weight of Duty.

John Jay Wiley (22:20): And his website is doctordondi.com. That's dr-dondi.com. Doctor-dondi.com. Understanding that look. Domestic disputes are the same.

John Jay Wiley (22:36): And by the way, one of the things I remember, talking with, some of was way back in the day when I was a police officer. And they're like, I don't understand. I live in a nice town in county and they stole my car. I'm like, where do you think these by the way, they take buses, they have stolen cars. Where do you think they go?

John Jay Wiley (22:57): Do you think they steal from the worst neighborhoods when no one's got anything, or they go to the nice neighborhoods? They went the nice neighborhoods. Said, you're not safe no matter where you go.

Dondi Day (23:06): Mhmm. Mhmm. Absolutely. You know, people there's a fallacy. People seem and you can see it.

Dondi Day (23:13): Everybody believes they're safe until they realize at that moment they're not safe. Right. You can you know, even at your your your residency, things can happen. Things can come to you. But, you know, what I've seen over the years during hurricanes and just the winter times, you know, people look for opportunities.

Dondi Day (23:34): The bad guys are out there. They are looking. And even in the wintertime, as we talked about briefly, You know, the wintertime, it's one of those things where, you know, the the night just drums on. You become so bored and so tired. Nothing's going on, and that's when things break.

Dondi Day (23:57): That's when, you know, all of a sudden you go from, you know, being bored to death to being in a a terror situation. Your your heart rate, your adrenaline just dumps. There was one night I was parked on the side of the road just, you know, the wintertime just just trying to stay awake, and I I I always sat near a curb. I I don't I always like drunk drivers. And on the beach, there there's no lack of drunk drivers.

Dondi Day (24:31): Any any day, any time, they're out there. So I park on this curve, and I'd watch the cars go around the curve. And I was sitting up near a condominium complex and just saw some movement underneath the condominium. And I snuck up to it in the patrol car, got out, started walking up. The next thing I know, I'm watching three guys bashing out the windows of cars.

Dondi Day (25:00): They were they were spilling everything they could find. And a lot of people leave their firearms in the cars.

Unknown Speaker (25:06): Right.

Dondi Day (25:08): When when I confronted them, now I'm by myself, totally by myself, confronted them, you know, they complied with everything that I told them to do, get down on the ground. You know, I was calling for backup. When my backup got there, we went in, handcuffed the guys, and then went in and took a look at what they had done. Believe it or not, they there was firearms in there, radar detectors, cash, everything they could get out of these cars. They were just bashing the windows.

Dondi Day (25:42): And, oh, another thing that was really interesting, the get up car, getaway car, which just parked right up the street with the guy sitting in an engine running. So they they were opportunists. They were there to get something really quick, but it happens. It happens all the time.

John Jay Wiley (26:01): It does. And the thing about it is and I I say this all the time. By the way, stranger on stranger crime is very rare. It's usually if it's gonna be someone that's going to hurt you, it's usually be someone you know. In case of homicides, it's someone you know.

John Jay Wiley (26:16): However, the big exception to that is if you disrupt and you startle someone committing another crime. So I'm very very much aware that while I'm walking my dog at night, I need to look at my surroundings. And some people say I'm a little I'm a little hypervigilant. How about you?

Dondi Day (26:32): Oh, absolutely. You know, you become that way, and the job actually ingrains that into you a little bit more because you need to be aware of everything going over around you. Somebody walking down the street, if they're eyeballing you, you need to be eyeballing them back. Absolutely. Know that you're you're not you're not gonna

Unknown Speaker (26:54): And I little I have a little thing to say I say in my mind. Don't say it aloud. My wife says it now. I'm not the one. I'm not the one you wanna play with.

Dondi Day (27:02): Exactly. Exactly. Sitting with your back to the door, away from the door, you need to be seeing everything. You know, people you know, you see people are just complacent. A lot of times.

Dondi Day (27:17): You're walking down the street and half the people you you see are on their phones. They they got their faces down. They're not paying attention to what's going on. Now my wife and I, she thought it was kinda strange how I would never sit with my back towards the door. And then No.

Unknown Speaker (27:35): Me either. Still don't do it.

Dondi Day (27:37): I I told her. I was like, well, this is why. I I need to be seeing everything coming in and out. You know, it took quite a long time. Now I still conceal carry, but it took a long time before I became comfortable going places without my sidearm.

Dondi Day (27:58): But in today's society, it's it's becoming more and more apparent that I'm gonna have to start carrying my my

John Jay Wiley (28:08): my arm everywhere I go. I I took many years where I did not carry. And what changed that for me was the school shooting at Sandy Hook in in Connecticut. Oh. Because Yeah.

John Jay Wiley (28:19): I I know me. I would go in. Even though I didn't live in Connecticut at the time, I would go in. And at least with a gun, I got a a fighting chance. He may have a rifle, but I'm gonna I'm gonna have I'm going out there, and that's what prompted me to change.

Dondi Day (28:33): Yeah. Absolutely. I mean, think about this, and I have had a couple of instances where, you know, a trooper be on the side of the road wrestling with somebody. You stop and you you lend a hand or, you know, I've I've had bar fights where police officers are trying to restrain somebody. That's kind of a common theme here on the coast.

Dondi Day (28:57): So you jump in and help them, but what happens if you run into something worse than that? Right? Where, like you said, the school shooting. Oh my gosh.

John Jay Wiley (29:09): And and one of the things that, and I wanna get a response to you very quickly is because we got a break coming up. When I I told my wife that this the reason why women are trained to go for the eyeballs in self defense tactics is not to incapacitate the attacker, is to force them out of their aggressive state into a defensive state. You it's almost impossible. And when you put lead down range at a bad guy, it forces them. It changes their game plan.

Dondi Day (29:40): Oh, yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. Everything about it. There was a if we got another minute, I've I've got another story.

John Jay Wiley (29:50): How about this? Why don't we talk about that story when we come back? We were talking with doctor Don D Day, and it's d o n d I. He's retired from the Apex North Carolina Police Department, and he worked in multiple coastal beachside resort towns in North Carolina before he went to the Apex Police Department. He's authored multiple books.

John Jay Wiley (30:12): Most recent is go smoke and the badge, a memoir of brotherhood, fear, a weight of duty, and his website is doctordr-don.com. That's dr-dondi.com. Doctor-dondi.com. This is law enforcement talk radio show. We're gonna talk in a few moments about the impact on him.

John Jay Wiley (30:34): I'm gonna ask you very quickly. Do you feel impacted still by police work?

Dondi Day (30:40): Oh, yeah. Absolutely. Once it gets into your blood, it's it's it's something that you're you're you're going to live with the rest of your life. You're gonna walk cop. You're gonna talk cop.

Unknown Speaker (30:52): You're gonna think cop. It's law enforcement's such a good profession. Yeah. I love law enforcement.

John Jay Wiley (31:00): It's a great profession. And by the way, I jokingly tell people that I'll be the the guy in the old folks home pushing a walker with tennis balls on and they go, shh, here's five o. He looks like a cop. Look like one. I talk like one.

John Jay Wiley (31:14): I act like one, and I am not embarrassed or ashamed of that at all. This is the Law Enforcement Talk Radio Show. We're gonna take a short break. I promise you, we'll be right back.

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John Jay Wiley (32:18): Returning conversation with doctor Don D Day on a law enforcement talk radio show. He is a retired police officer from Apex, North Carolina Police Department, and he worked in multiple coastal resort towns before that. He's the author of multiple books, ghosts, most recent ghosts, smoke, and the badge, a memoir of brotherhood, fear, and the weight of duty. His website is doctordond.com. That's dr-dondi.com.

John Jay Wiley (32:45): Doctor hyphen donndi dot com. Got a quick question for you. And generally, I put a lot of this place a lot of this stuff from police work to bed where it doesn't bothers me as much. There's things I don't do, one, and I do. I'm very good about going to bed around the same time every night.

John Jay Wiley (33:02): I eat around the same time every day. And I'm I'm really close to being self aware and prayer and meditation, all that stuff because what I found for me and this I find I don't watch dashcam videos, I don't watch police videos, I don't watch any of stuff, and there's certain things on TV that's so realistic that I'm like, I start screaming at TV and eliminate that stuff at all because the bad stuff happens or comes up when I least expect it.

Dondi Day (33:31): You know, I I agree with everything that you just said. I don't watch cop movies because they're they're so unrealistic.

Unknown Speaker (33:41): Right.

Dondi Day (33:41): It it just drives me insane. And then when I watch realistic cop shows or videos, you know, I I become so engrossed in the moment. My heart's racing. It's pounding, and I can see myself in a lot of the the situations that they're in. You know, one of the things that I I will watch once in a while is like highway patrol chases something.

Dondi Day (34:08): And you can see yourself. You've been in, you know, that situation. You have done the stuff that these troopers are doing, and it it can it can really take a toll on you somewhat. I mean, if you think about it, think about how many adrenaline dumps you've had over the

Unknown Speaker (34:27): years. Lost track.

Dondi Day (34:29): Yeah. And, you know, that's while it's exciting and it's fun, it's doing it over the years, it ages you, it tires you, it it does everything to you. So there are some bad effects to it, but, man, I I love it. And anytime I pass blue lights on the side of the road, you know, it's it's, you know, you you wanna jump into it and just go and be part of that. But when you retire, you know, things are a lot different.

Dondi Day (35:02): Your whole outlook on everything just changes.

John Jay Wiley (35:06): Mine my outlook changed. I I still think like a cop a lot of times. And by the way, I've pulled over, and I've helped officers in fights. That's not a problem. I'll continue to do that even when I'm an old geezer, which I'm I'm not pretty I'm a lot older than I thought I'd be.

John Jay Wiley (35:19): I I never thought I'd live this long, but I'll continue to do that. And they did that for me. I'm gonna do that for them. When I have to be aware because quite honestly, Don D, it takes so long for me to get back to what I call my center. And by the way, I used to watch some of his videos and every now and then on my phone, I'll do that.

John Jay Wiley (35:41): I'll watch a video and I'll start. And I hear my wife yelling from another room. You need to turn that stuff off because I'm vocalizing the whole time.

Dondi Day (35:50): Mhmm. Mhmm. It's absolutely true. I I do the same thing. I I think it it's it just becomes ingrained and wired in us, and we we take the same reactions.

Dondi Day (36:02): But, again, you know, a lot of times when you are in that moment, you're reliving those scenarios that you went through. You've been through them. You know what the chase is like. You know what the wreck is like. You know all these things.

Dondi Day (36:19): I tell my wife, you know, I'll watch a video and I was like, you know, I've I've been there. I've done that. You know, I pitted a car, and I've seen it wreck. You know, I've seen it flip over, roll over so many times where people get ejected from it. Bad things happen.

Dondi Day (36:38): But I think that's what it is is you're just reliving that moment yourself, and that's why you become so vocal. You start screaming at, put it down. Put it down. Or, you know, I know it's one gentleman stopped. He the first thing he did was he got out and he reached under the seat and which I've I was already drawn down on him.

Dondi Day (37:04): And he pulls out a handgun, and he doesn't point it at me. He just throws it on the ground and starts running, and I'm screaming at him. I was watching a video of something very similar the other day. I was like, I've been there. I've seen it.

Unknown Speaker (37:18): I've done it. Yeah.

John Jay Wiley (37:21): And what they don't explain and by the way, I I've adopted an attitude, especially on the Facebook page. 99% of responses that people get in the law enforcement talk radio show face or page are positive. There's a few that you're like, oh, why didn't they tase them instead of shooting them? I'm like, well, we had a saying back when I was policing, and we didn't have tasers back then. By the way, tasers fail twenty five to forty percent of the time.

John Jay Wiley (37:45): That's the estimate. And it's not it's it's it's intended for when people resist arrest. It's not intended as a weapon for self defense when it comes to lethal force. And we had a for example, I I don't feel it's my job to educate people the 21 foot rule when it comes to edge weapons.

Unknown Speaker (38:04): Oh

John Jay Wiley (38:04): gosh. People don't they don't understand that. They're like, well, he's a long ways away. Why did they have to shoot him? Because he's within 21 feet, and he can get to you and stab you, you know what, many times.

Unknown Speaker (38:17): You know, it's it's not just a knife. It could be a bat.

Unknown Speaker (38:22): Oh, yeah.

Unknown Speaker (38:23): It could be a pipe. It could be anything.

John Jay Wiley (38:25): We just had an certain objectives. I think in New Jersey, a sergeant who shot a guy armed with a bat, very confrontational, and the state is bringing charge zone. He's being charged with manslaughter and for on duty shooting of a guy armed with a baseball bat.

Unknown Speaker (38:42): Wow. You know?

Unknown Speaker (38:43): And that could've been us.

Dondi Day (38:44): That's you and I, we were in law enforcement about the same time. So I went in in '87. And like you, we didn't have tasers. No. In fact, we didn't even have pepper spray.

Unknown Speaker (38:58): We had

John Jay Wiley (38:58): What they say about pepper spray when they in fact, what they issued mace, was what you called it. Pepper spray in the vest, and they say

Unknown Speaker (39:04): Yeah.

John Jay Wiley (39:05): Mace only works on bad on innocent bystanders and police. It doesn't work on anybody else.

Dondi Day (39:11): You're right about that. But, yeah, the the law enforcement has has changed over the years, but for whoever it is bringing charges against that officer. I I think a lot of the issues that I've seen over the years is it's armchair quarterbacking.

Unknown Speaker (39:31): Exactly. It's

Dondi Day (39:32): people making these assumptions, and they don't know. They weren't there.

John Jay Wiley (39:37): They didn't live. They totally disregard Supreme Court findings about police, and they proceed anyway. But that here's what and we'll get to your story in a moment. They'll use a grand jury as a tactic because they lack political backbone to say the officer did something wrong, and we're not gonna prosecute him. So your most recent book you wrote is go smoke and a badge, a memoir of brotherhood, fear, and a weight of duty.

John Jay Wiley (39:59): Did you write that for cathartic reasons, or do you do you have a story to tell?

Dondi Day (40:05): Well, what prompted it was I I would sit down and tell my children these stories. And one day, I I just thought, well, I need to just write about it and put it down. Of course, it doesn't contain every call, every memory. It's just a snapshot of what it was like for me in law enforcement. So that that's how it originated was exactly that.

Dondi Day (40:34): And I took, you know, some of the most powerful stories that I recall. I mean, some bad, some good, some funny, little bit of everything in there. But it it's not a collection of war stories. I tried to put some meaning behind it, how it impacted me. And the reason that I went from law enforcement into retirement into a second career.

Dondi Day (41:00): All of that's in there, and my motivations for doing it are in there as well.

John Jay Wiley (41:04): Well, for me, it was quite honestly, I needed something to do because, and by the way, the pension that I got from getting hurt was not enough to live off of.

Dondi Day (41:12): Right. Well, I I decided with the the birth of my son, you know, a lot of people that are outside of first responders or military, they they don't truly appreciate or know the the sacrifice that people like that are making. You miss the holidays Right. The birthdays, you know, all these special events. You're not there.

Dondi Day (41:46): And I sat down one day, and I started thinking about it. And I I was like, you know, I have missed so many special events in my career. And I I I just thought, well, maybe it's time to start another career.

John Jay Wiley (42:00): And I I I do wanna be there for the next one. So your website, by the way, we're gonna wrap things up, is doctordr-dondi.com, dondi.com. Doctor-dondi.com. By the way, thank you for your service, and thanks for being a guest on the law enforcement talk radio show. Thank you.

Unknown Speaker (42:17): Thank you.

John Jay Wiley (42:18): I'd like to thank our guests for coming on the Law Enforcement Talk Radio Show. The Law Enforcement Talk Radio Show is a nationally syndicated weekly radio show broadcast on numerous AM and FM radio stations across the country. We're always adding more affiliate stations. If you enjoyed the podcast version of the show, which is always free, please do me a favor and tell a friend or two or three. I'll be back in just a few days with another episode of the law enforcement talk radio show and podcast.

John Jay Wiley (42:46): Until then, this is John Jay Wiley. See

Unknown Speaker (42:59): show to grow. Thank you for listening.